Wander - Googly Eyes

I feel like I'm about to have a "Dark Helmet moment." Explaining how I came into this beer is going to sound a bit like "I am your father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate." A coworker and friend, who also likes craft beer, is also a graphic designer. He of course has other friends who like craft beer and a few who brew it. One of those friends has started Wander Brewery and needed my coworker to design a can for him. As part of the payment, my friend received some of said beers he helped to package, and shared a can with me to celebrate his success.

That turned out much longer than Dark Helmet. Maybe one of the powers of the Schwartz is brevity.  In any case, this pint can labels as a Double IPA and hails from Bellingham, WA. Can I expect one of the West Coast hop bombs or one of the trendy new cloudy East Coast concoctions? One way to find out.  Let's pour!

Aroma 9/12

First to the nose is pineapple, but grapefruit and pine resin are also abundant. I'm going to give this another sniff after it's had a chance to warm up a bit... OK, some caramel malts are finally starting to poke through, which is to be expected. Grapefruit is now the primary aroma. Smells like a DIPA, but isn't particularly earth shattering.

Appearance 3/3

Appropriate for this time of year, the beer pours a bright, pumpkin-y shade of orange into the glass with copper glints abundant. The beer is surprisingly clear - not a trace of cloudiness here to hint at some sort of East Coast styling (not even with a swirl of the can to stir up the dregs). Pillars of bubbles stream to the surface like a champagne, giving at least a consistent half finger of foam even after the beer has sat temporarily. That ivory-colored head starts out looking thick like whipped heavy cream, but eventually leaves big gaps where large bubbles have escaped. Nice lacing too.

Flavor 19/20

After smelling those caramel malts, I expected a sweeter introduction to Googly Eyes. Instead, it was rather neutral or cream-like, which does allow one to pay attention to the body and mouthfeel rather quickly. A quick touch of light caramel, almost honey-like, sweetness and then the hop profile kicks into full gear and it's off to the races. My notes list the following flavors and I almost couldn't jot them down fast enough: weed, earth, spiciness, pepper, woody, resin. This is definitely not the citrus cocktail that most folks fawn after, but that certainly doesn't make it any less complex nor any less of a feat to bring out all those flavors. How many hop varieties are in this anyway? The longer you hold it in the mouth, the more you will discover. The finish is more of the spice and pepper, plus a tiny bit of the 8.5% ABV. Well, if you've held it in your mouth.  Quicker swigs allow that crazy hop profile to blend a little more with less-than-intense sweetness. Aftertaste is that grapefruit bitter and tingle on the tongue, plus that undeniable earthiness.

Mouthfeel 5/5

Big and solid, without being syrupy or heavy.  Perfect level of carbonation that gets an assist from the peppery hops that are prickly on the tongue. Alcohol warmth is basically hidden. I'm pretty sure I could drink this faster than I should.

Overall Impression  9/10

That hop profile is impressive!  Lots going on there. Appearance is appropriate, mouthfeel is great, drinkability is dangerously high. The aroma seemed to be the beer largest shortcoming. Of course, I am just recovering from a cold, but as I can breathe through both nostrils, I hope this isn't too large of a handicap. I would definitely buy a 4-pack of this,or feel comfortable giving it to a hop head friend.

Total  45/50

Definite "bonus points" for hop complexity. I said it before, this bitter, earthy mix isn't everybody's cup of tea, but that shouldn't detract from the variety of flavors presented.. Hop heads will love it anyway. The sweetness is a bit "watered down" for as big a style as a DIPA should be, then again a larger malt sweetness may have hidden some of the hop complexity. Though with the aggressive flavors in these hops, I find that unlikely. That and the basic aroma are all that are holding this beer back in any fashion. In my mind, the complexity is the significantly more difficult characteristic to produce 

The Alchemist - Heady Topper

Out of the blue, an old college buddy named Wilder texts me.  This is the transcript.

Wilder:  Hey question for you.  You still doing that beer review?

Sud:  I still have it, but I haven't written on it for quite some time.  Though I know I will when I try some on my bucket list that I want to remember.

Wilder:  Is Heady Topper on that list?

Sud:  I would say so.

Sud:  Consider my curiosity piqued.

Wilder: My dad just came back from VT and brought 7 cans with him.  I asked if he'd be part with 1 to another beer nerd who named their first kid the same name as my brother.  He said sure.

Sud:  You keep this shit up and I'm gonna name the next one Wilder.

At that point, in the true spirit of craft beer altruism, he also tried to tell me he wanted nothing in return and offered to transport the beer to me!  Thrilled enough with the prospect of finally being able to try Heady, I gave him a Prairie Artisan Ales "Christmas Bomb" and went to pick the beer up myself.  However, this did not diminish my appreciation one bit.  Heady is obtainable in the Midwest but typically one must be willing to part with some pretty primo barely pops in order to do so.  That said, this opportunity is being relished for the gem it is.  Let's pour!

***Note:  Both of my prized tasting glasses from Port City Brewing have met rather unfortunate ends; neither at my hands.  Also, my typical "beer reviewing space" is in the process of being remodeled.  Those two things in mind, there has been a rather unceremonious change in glassware and location, both of which are temporary.***

Aroma 12/12

Strong pine followed by aromas  of its cannabaceae relative and some distant mustiness.  All of this is sitting atop a large supporting cast of sweet malts that are difficult to discern through the wash of citrus nectar.  If there's something that The Alchemist is missing here, I can't think of it.  Color me impressed.  As the beer begins to warm the pine is replaced very distinctly by the tropical fruits and the slight sting of resin.

Appearance: 3/3

A pleasant bright and hazy ochre with accents that, appropriately for this time of year, remind one of a ripe cantaloupe.  Head is thin, nearly as white as the paper on which I'm taking my notes, and thin - taking very little time to settle as a barely a film on the beer's surface.  Translucent.

Flavor 20/20

Initial flavors were hard to isolate because this beer jumps right into the body.  Very reminiscent of grapefruit, with a mixture of bitter and citrus sweetness dancing together as able partners.  At first, the main body offers mostly bitter flavors, but once the mouth has conditioned to that a wonderful array of flavors takes over: resin, honey, and grapefruit.  I'm going to take a minute to make an analogy about the grapefruit in this beer.  It's like Jelly Bellys to regular jelly beans.  Jelly Bellys are amazing, right?  Why?  Because they taste exactly like what they say they will.  Pear?  Buttered popcorn (my favorite)?  Mango?  Jelly Belly nails it every time.  Heady Topper is like tasting a grapefruit flavored Jelly Belly.  Sure, using a standardized vocabulary you state that many beers offer grapefruit flavors.  That's like comparing a red jelly bean to Jelly Belly's cherry flavor.  Jelly Bell actually tastes like the real thing.  So does Heady Topper.  It tastes like honest-to-goodness grapefruit.  No analogy.  No kinda-sorta-almost.  Grapefruit is in there.  And the strange thing is, I don't enjoy eating that actual fruit, but I dig this beer.  

Anyway, like I was saying: resin, honey, grapefruit.  But as it warms, much like in the aroma, those tropical fruit flavors are becoming more pronounced and getting ready to party.  The aftertaste at first was musty, but again, after the mouth becomes conditioned, things change.  It went from musty to almost the complete opposite end of the scale by showing off its sweet tropical hoppy flavors.  Finish is a bready sweetness with a true, but never overwhelming, bitter earthiness that lasts and lasts and gives the beer's final impression.  Maybe even a little peppery?  Yes, definitely peppery, but only after the 8% ABV has subtly and finally revealed itself ever so briefly.  This is not a palate wrecker by any means, but more of a showcase of what hops are capable of in skilled and nurturing hands.

Mouthfeel 5/5

Just wow.  Bigger beers should take note.  There is plenty of sensation of carbonation on the tongue, but never in danger of becoming prickly nor effervescent nor heavy and sluggish.  It's perfect.  Furthermore, it helps cover up the medium-heavy body of this DIPA and makes it ridiculously drinkable.  Even the alcohol warmth is all but invisible until well after the swallow.  Well done at every possible turn.

Overall Impression 10/10

Confession: Heady Topper didn't instantly "wow" me.  It was not some beer that kicks your palate's face and then demands its lunch money.  There was no wide-eyed epiphany, pillar of light, or chorus of angels.  This beer's approach was much more cerebral.  It shows you one facet, then quickly changes to show yet another.  Before half the beer is gone, you've tasted 8 or 9 very different flavors, and smelled nearly as many aromas.  This is a technical masterpiece of hops.  Admittedly, it seems unfair to label something as "technical" when it abounds with such pleasing aesthetic qualities, but with such complexity I find anything else less plausible.

Total 50/50

Much like cooking, the brewing of beer is as much science as it is art.  People like Alton Brown have shown us the science behind delicious recipes and combinations, and others can combine ingredients without any training except experience in a way that bends chemistry to their will while simultaneously ignoring it.  Which does Heady Topper do?  I'm tempted to say the former.  The mastery of hops in this beer is so complete that I find it hard to believe that anything but careful study and tedious practice could be its foundation.  Regardless of its origins, the beer has clearly earned its reputation.  I am typically skeptical of such widely-acclaimed brews, but the endless complexity, drinkability, and perfect mouthfeel have easily won me over and earned a perfect score.  I have never had a more complex beer that changes more in the glass than Heady Topper.

Speaking of complexity, Heady is a beer I would love to do a vertical of week by week.  I feel that its complexity warrants it and new flavors would come and go as the beer ages and changes.  To anybody who has that access and opportunity, a toast to you.  Don't let that opportunity slip by.

Thanks Wilder!

Surly - Wet

Well, this is one of those beers that I never thought I was going to be able to try. It sells quick, it doesn’t distribute outside the brewer's home state, and while I have plenty of family in Minnesota, I don’t have a go to trading partner up there. So when my wife brought back some Boston-based Wachusett beer for some friends that used to live there, imagine my surprise when they responded in kind with this little gem! Thanks Jim & Anne!  In fact, I only received this beer last night, but so much of its reputation is based on freshness that I wanted to drink it and review it as soon as possible.

For those not familiar with Surly’s Wet, it boasts on its can that the hops are picked on Day1, shipped on Day 2, and used on Day 4 so that the hops never have a chance to dry out.  Different hop varieties are used so the brew may vary a bit, but rest assured that will this much attention being paid to freshness (or "Ultra-Fresh" as the can states) you are all but guaranteed a big resiny treat.  The beer that I am reviewing today was canned on 10/1/2012.

Please excuse both my recent posting infrequency as I have just moved into my first house. There are features of said house that will definitely warrant their own post in the coming months. This also means that I haven’t yet set up a great spot to take pictures of these amazing beers, so bear with me.  Let's pour!

Aroma 12/12
Things begin with some very pleasant pine and orange rind notes. Rising up just behind those are mangos, pineapples, and some resin lingering in the background. However, once the beer begins to warm the resin takes on more of a primary role with the rind and gives a very “bitter orange” vibe to the overall character. Along with this resin comes some pretty strong grassy notes and since I happen to love that particular hop trait, it is most welcome. For those of you keeping track, yes I’ve only talked about the hop aromas thus far. The malts are in there, but are very far back and only open up once the beer has warmed. I’m thankful they show up as it gives the beer a more substantial, intense aroma and their sweetness helps to emphasize the sweet hop aromas like the pineapple. 

Appearance 3/3
This beer pours lighter than I expected, but still looks like a million damn dollars. It shines like a orange sapphire (yes, there are orange sapphires, smarty pants) and enjoys much of the same brilliance and clarity. Its robust eggshell colored head is maintained by a constantly ascending carbonation. The head forms slowly but builds tall and fluffy, before settling a bit and taking on more of a whipped cream texture. If any photographers out there are looking to create stock images of beer and what it should look like, this is it. Wow! Also worth mentioning, I’ve written the review up until this point with beer in my glass and the head is still present! I’ve never seen retention like this. Top marks and extra sparkle magic unicorn rainbow brownie bonus points to Surly for this! 

Flavor 19/20
First impressions are everything and this beer’s impression is bitter. I’m anxious to see what happens once my taste buds acclimate a bit more to the bitterness. Interestingly enough, the bitter in the first sips can be sensed in accented waves, each punctuating its own beginning. My initial notes read as, “woody, resin, long lasting bitter” and I’m pretty sure a part of my tongue went numb. Thankfully it recovered, finally acclimated, and then other flavors begin to emerge. Most notably are a muted pineapple and a sweet malt that I am having trouble placing. It’s sweet and lighter and almost sugary, which makes me think honey but the flavor isn’t correct for honey. This malt flavor is more fruitlike and definitely not the typical caramel malts used in making heavy duty West Coast IPAs. A quick wine taster’s slurp gives me little additional information, only a splash pineapple, a hint of the warmth, some nice pepper spice, and shot of pure resin. The finish is (obviously) not as intensely bitter as when I started this glass, but it still unapologetically offers its own take. Immediately after swallowing is a mellow sweetness, detectable only after one’s tongue has been adequately prepared for the resin, and then an intense aspirin-like bitter that fades in to tie up any loose ends. In hindsight, the sweet malts that confused me earlier are probably caramel malts that taste sweeter with melding with pineapple from the hops. It’s a great combination!

Mouthfeel 5/5
A big bodied beer to hold some big flavors. It rolls around in the mouth like mercury, but the hops’ spicy pepper note give a prickly sensation on the tongue and keeps it from becoming sluggish. The carbonation that was so present in the glass and contributing to the head is still ascending in subsequent pours, but this diminishes its presence in the mouth. The result is a beer that feels exceptionally smooth and silky thanks to an unobtrusive carbonation that dies quickly once inside the mouth. The warmth that became present during a slurp really never had much more presence than that. 

Overall Impression 9/10 
This beer is impressive, but definitely has the potential to be more-so if drank closer to its birth date.  I feel that the main consequence is that the fruits in the aroma do not come out as well in the flavor, resulting in a less complex beer than it was created to be. At 2 ½ months of age, this beer still has plenty going for it. It’s head and appearance were fantastic, its aroma was excellent, and it’s tasty as all get out. Right now it stands as a strong West Coast IPA, but at a younger age it could truly stand out from the pack. The only question is how to do that. How can you possibly get this beer with any less hop deterioration than Surly has tried to do?

Total 48/50

The answer to the question in the previous sentence is, “you don’t.” Surly has made more than an earnest effort to get a beer into its customers’ waiting hands that is as fresh as they can possibly make it and can it. Any further action lies in the hands of distributors, retailers, and how quickly craft beer drinkers can snatch it off the shelves. I dig this beer as a whole, with only minor nit-picky issues here and there. If Surly had the same distribution abilities as Oskar Blues, this beer would compete nationally with Deviant Dales. Hop heads should of course seek it out as fresh as possible, but if you’re not accustomed to how relentless hops can be, you may wanna sit this one out. This beer is a stern reminder than Minnesota is not just a state of quiet, polite, church-going folk. It’s also a state filled with potential hockey defensemen ready to administer a hockey stick enema if you stand in their crease too long. So noted, Surly. So noted.

Stone - 16th Anniversary IPA

In the interest of drinking beers before their hop profile has deteriorated, I have decided to crack open my bottle of Stone's 16th Anniversary IPA.  This beer promises to be a doozey with Stone stating right on the bottle that they're brewing this one with lemon verbena & lemon oil.  Now I had a pretty good idea of what lemon oil was, but I had not heard of lemon verbena, so if you need to look it up like I did, then click here.  Whether you know or you don't, new ingredients get me excited and I'm always ready to try one out.  So let's pour!

Aroma 12/12

Starting off, things were pretty impressive.  Excellent lemon and pineapple notes from the hops as well as a lesser herbal quality and a dash of pepper.  The warmth arrived calmly and easily, while the malts provided a dark bread (almost earthy) & roasted qualities.  Very nice all around!  I then sat down to do some typing and the like and came back to it after it had warmed and let me say this... LET THIS BEER WARM!  I know that it's fairly common knowledge in the craft beer universe that beers open up as they warm, but rarely can I recall a beer that so aptly provides such an example to that lesson.  This beer became infinitely richer and nearly succulent with hoppy goodness.  This is what world class IPAs should smell like!  The original flavors intensified greatly, but also brought in a great resin aroma, a surprising floral essence(!), some reminders of the hops' Cannabaceae relatives, gooey caramel malts, and upped the booziness just a little bit.  Fantastic!

Appearance 3/3

This is a beautiful beer.  It pours a color that nearly matches the shade on the bottle and is bright and clear as a crisp fall day.  When I poured it, the head overcame the top of the glass, but was so sticky that it continued to ascend in the shape it left the glass.  Almost like a Play-Dough Fun Factory, but for head.  I'm very impressed.

Flavor 19/20

As difficult as it was to stop sniffing this beer, my mouth wouldn't stop watering and I finally gave in and tasted it.  I was given a smooth salutation from some silky caramel malts, but before long the other flavors begin to slide their way in as well:  pepper, resin, very subdued apple/mango notes, and an undying caramel.  An unusual citrus is present as well presumably from the lemon verbana and/or lemon oil used in the brewing process.  It's definitely a more candied, sugary lemon flavor, but its appearance is not unwelcome.  In fact, this particular type of sweetness goes remarkably well with the caramel sweetness from the malts.  What a fan-freakin'-tastic balance of an intense sweetness and a big, strong bitter.  If held long enough in the mouth the sugary lemon can be easily detected on the tip of the tongue, but eventually transforms into a peppery, resin-laden concoction.  This type of complexity is SO satisfying.  The last two flavors in the mouth (pepper and resin) are a Stone's ridiculously talented way of foreshadowing the finish before it actually happens.  The finish removes 90% of the sweetness that was experienced in the backbone of the beer and instead gives the drinker a bitter, very peppery, resin-dripping, bitter affair that quickly leaves a moderate dryness.  The aftertaste is largely remnants of the bitter, but eventually the entire mouth is salivating for the next gulp.

Mouthfeel 5/5

This beer is a little more than medium-bodied, but made to feel like much more thanks to the buried carbonation and the ridiculous amounts of smoothness that provides.  It is insanely silk relative to its body.  The gads of peppery spice give the illusion of carbonation but make no mistake, any carbonation involved in this bad boy is far beneath the surface.  Warmth is used appropriately and also contributes to the big beer feel of this brew.

Overall Impression 10/10

What's not to like about this?  The balance of sweetness and bitter is fantastic, the mouthfeel is to die for yet avoids being a chore to drink, complexity abounds, and my mouth and nose are left extremely happy.  Some folks could argue that their DIPA has been made too sweet.  I understand that.  Some folks want their IPAs and DIPAs a little more one-sided than others.  For me, this really hit the spot with big flavors on both sides just slugging it out.

Total 49/50

I'm not sure why this beer is rated as low as it is by so many people.  Maybe there are more hopheads out there, who don't like any stupid malts sweetening up their beers, than I had originally assumed.  For me, I dig it.  Not only that, but I didn't find out until much later how much rye Stone used in brewing this beer.  That makes perfect sense!  The pepper spiciness and the earthy bitter now come clearly into focus.  Though admittedly, the bitter was easy to confuse as hops due to... well, the abundance of hops.  This is the second Stone beer in a row that I review that has received a 49/50.  The first was their 10th Aniversary Ruination and while this beer is much less intense than the 10th Anniv Ruination, it should not be overlooked.  ESPECIALLY because of its $7.99 price tag.  This beer is a steal and I can't believe I can still find it on shelves.  Do yourself a favor and take advantage of its wide and plentiful distribution.  You shan't be disappointed.  Good on ya Stone for another variation of the IPA style!!  Happy anniversary and many, MANY more.

Stone - Ruination 10th Anniversary

As if Stone's regular version of Ruination wasn't aggressive enough, for their tenth anniversary of the brew they really upped the ante.  The ABV jumps from 7.7% to 10.8% and they used TWICE an much hops in the brewing process (5 lbs/bbl).  That number doesn't even include the pound each of Citra and Centennial used in the drop hopping!  This brings it up to a sadomasochistic 110 IBUs and undoubtedly intoxicating aroma.  I figured this would be a good choice to review today as it should have no issues blasting through to my allergy laden sinuses.  I also selected this brew as Stone is not the only one celebrating an anniversary.  This week was my third wedding anniversary and like Stone's, it will be bitter (just kidding, wife).  My wife may have left town to go to Boston to see her sister and I will be giving her crap about that for the next 50 years even though she is well aware how flexible I am with dates typically reserved for celebration.  All joking aside, I'm very excited to be cracking open this beer (and to be married to such a patient woman).  Let's pour!

Aroma 12/12

On a day where my sinuses seem bent on revolution and forming their own sovereign state, this beer speaks as sweetly to them as any ambassador.  Immediately detectable are pineapple, lemon zest, grapefruit, and pine.  Traveling behind those, in an appropriately viscous manner, is a slow-moving, dank resin and a gooey caramel/toffee combination.  Awesome.  Awesome.  Awesome.  As the beer warms, mandarin oranges show up for the anniversary celebration as well as a hint of alcohol warmth.

Appearance 3/3

What an appropriate color for the newly-arrived fall months.  A cloudy glowing gourd shade of orange fills the glass and exhibits a wonderfully-sized cream colored head.  There's a fair bit of lacing, even if it seems that the weight of the beer would prefer to pull it right back into the glass.

Flavor 20/20

Whoa!  Where to start with this?!  After a gentle wash of caramel sweetness on the tip of the tongue and a playful citrus preview, this beer becomes more bitter than a custody battle.  Over septuplets.  This beer while not defining unbalanced, definitely spoils the hops and lets them get away with murder.  The bitter taste in the backbone of this beer is unlike anything I've ever drank.  It simply permeates everything.  I can't say that the beer is unbalanced, since there are other malt elements at work here.  However, the hops put their own tint on everything as if they were imitating Picasso's Blue Period.  What's especially neat is that the other flavors DO remain detectable, but they are now a "bitter" version of themselves.  Bitter caramel.  Bitter oranges.  Bitter pineapple.  You name the flavor and this beer has transmutated it into something completely different.  The finish is rather like a Wile. E Coyote cartoon, where it experiences an unusual hovering of sweetness before falling promptly into a unrelenting bitter (minus the tiny umbrellas and exclamatory signs).  I should also mention that the bitter involved in all phases of this beer is akin to chewing on an ibuprofen tablet, though much more muted.  It is sharp and commands attention.  The aftertaste is equally unrelenting and the sticky nature of this beer allows it to linger longer than in-laws during the holidays.  I mean, the bitter just goes on.  And on.  It dries the mouth insanely well and one's common sense is challenged when taking another sip, knowing that it was the beer that caused the problem in the first place!

Mouthfeel 5/5

This beer will absolutely coat every surface your mouth like fresh stucco.  You can't get rid of it!  This thick and sticky brew traps the bitter flavors in on your tongue and holds it hostage.  The carbonation is wisely left in the shadows for this brew.  It can be confused with alcohol heat and hop spice in initial sips, but ultimately it serves to add to a silky quality.

Overall Impression 9/10

I am only halfway through this brew and am already aware that this is going to be a battle.  It is just such  a strong brew!  The aroma is powerful, the taste is Herculean, and the body is titanic.  That said, this beer accepts no excuses, but I find myself wishing it were a bit more forgiving.  There are some really beautiful flavors present in this beer, but they are shoved violently into the lockers as the hop bitter and alcohol make their way down the high school hallway of your palate.  I certainly cannot fault this beer for not being flavorful enough.  This beer is intense and only for those experienced in the ways of hops and craft beer.

Overall Impression 49/50

For what it is, this beer earns an appropriately high score.  You want DIPA?  You got DIPA.  In fact, this supersedes DIPA and you could probably give it some new, confusing nomenclature (DIPA+, TRIPA?).  However, when it comes down to it there are other factors at play in this beer and they definitely deserve their time in the spotlight.  Yes, DIPAs and IIPAs need to be somewhat abrasive.  After all, isn't that why we buy them?  While the answer should be yes, this beer makes that decision almost punitive.  This brew is certainly a sipper and is sure to please even the most staunch of hop heads.  It's good for what it is, but I could use a intermission from all its unabashedness.  This beer is a monster and I hate to say it, but it kicked my ass.  Consider my palate ruined, Stone.  You've done your job well.

Sources:

http://www.stonebrew.com/ruintenth/

Green Flash - Palate Wrecker

When you see a beer emblazoned with such an appellation, it really demands that you pick it up.  I mean, c'mon... Palate Wrecker?  It jabs your curiosity with a red hot poker and challenges you at the same time.  I know exactly what this beer is made to do and when you're in the mood for that hoppy, bitter, sticky goodness, nothing else will do.  There's no IBUs listed on the label, but it states a 9.5% ABV.  Good, I never really liked my liver anyway.  I'm ready to crack this open, I just hope it doesn't crack back.  Let's pour!

Aroma 11/12

Starting off, this beer leaves no hop scent unturned.  It begins with a strong grassy smell, adds resin, grapefruit, pine, and dabbles with some oranges.  The malts come through as hay-like with a touch of mustiness, but also offer a distant bit of brown sugar which has to shout to be heard through the citrusy hops.  Once the beer settles a bit, the hops fall into a pine & citrus partnership, with a bit of herbal tickle that keeps us mindful of the hop plant's relations in the Hemp family (cannabaceae, pronounced can-uh-BAY-shee-ay).  The citrus comes across as so sweet and fragrant that it borders of floral.  Very nice.

Appearance 3/3

As expected this beer showed great head, lacing, and retention.  The sticky head was a slightly yellowed ivory color and covered the surface well after the pour.  The color is more copper and amber than I expected.  Well, I guess most IPAs are copper and/or amber, but this appears more red when just sitting in the glass.

Flavor 17/20

I was about to take the first sip of this beer and I began to wonder as I raised the glass to my mouth, "Will this be a really sweet opening to this beer to balance the malt or just rush right in with bitter?"  Answer:  It SLAMMED me with bitter.  I take that back, there's a light sugary citrus note that floats for just a moment before being comically crushed with an anvil.  Despite this barely exaggerated description, there really is more to this beer but you've gotta pay pretty close attention to find it behind the "These-go-to-eleven" level of hops.  After the bitter explosion, if you hold the beer in the mouth, you'll get quite an intense resin flavor mixed with a pseudo-balancing citrus sweetness, honey, and some sugary, caramel malts.  Not only does holding the beer in the mouth help find these flavors, but so does acclimating your palate to the bitterness.  Halfway through the bottle, these flavors become much easier to detect.  Good heavens is this beer bitter!  The finish is, you guessed it, ridiculously bitter.  However, a quicker swig lets the caramel malts help fend off most of the bitterness.  The beer is sticky in the back of the throat and makes saliva difficult to swallow.

Mouthfeel 4/5

Adequate carbonation in the beginning, but toward the end of the bottle the carbonation has abandoned ship which does not help to finish off this monster beer.  The alcohol warmth is invisible behind the hops and the body is just as heavy as the sticky head and remnants in the back of the throat would have you believe.  Normally, I'd say the minimal level of carbonation is perfect, but in a beer this strong and heavy I could really use a few extra bubbles.  There is nothing small about the mouthfeel of this beer.

Overall Impression 8/10

For what it is, it's a kick ass beer.  No really.  It might just kick your ass.  Large aroma, gargantuan flavors, and a car crushing mouthfeel all make this not a beer to be taken lightly.  True to it's name, it is a palate wrecker.  Those looking for balance or nuance look elsewhere.  You'll not find it here.  If you've got a hankering for hops... this. is. it.  

Total 43/50

Well, I was looking for hops when I bought this and boy did I find them.  This beer absolutely walloped me in the mouth and did not apologize afterwards.  It then kicked my cat and pinched a baby.  I'm not sure where it got the baby because I don't even have kids.  Palate Wrecker is an insanely accurate name and description for this beer.  This is both good and bad.  It's good because it doesn't leave you wondering if the brewer meant to make a more nuanced, balanced DIPA/IIPA.  He/she did not.  They made this beer to destroy you.  It's bad because FAR more often than not, I want to drink a beer with balance.  This beer sacrifices drinkability, balance, nuance, and complexity all in the name of what your tongue can endure.

This is not a beer I could drink every day.  It is, without question, a special occasion beer.  It's the beer you keep on hand to see how many IBUs your craft beer buddies can take or when you're REALLY in the mood for something hoppy.  However, it never claims to be anything but.  It says Palate Wrecker right on the friggin' label.  What did you think you were getting?  Due to its honesty and implying the brewers' intentions, I cannot rate it lower.  This beer is exactly what it wants to be.  No apologies.